Letters to My Daughter - I Wish

Mija,

You've hit kind of a rough patch.  According to Jen Hatmaker, you're firmly in the Spaz-Out phase.  Here's how she describes it:

Stage 2: Spaz Out (4-6 Weeks – 3-4 Months)

Who knows what the straw on the camel’s back will be – maybe one more food he hates, maybe one final conversation he can’t decode, a moment of discipline, just a smell might trigger it – but something will happen, and your little one will finally lose it. Honeymoon is over. Once the damn has broken, it will flood for months.

There is screaming, kicking, hysterical hysterics. There is wailing and tantrums and full-out meltdowns. You may chase your beefy 8-year-old down the street where he ran screaming barefoot into traffic, throw him over your shoulder and lug him back home where the two of you hunker down for the next two hours, drenched in sweat, while you hold him tight and whisper love into his ears and he thrashes and yells and finally passes out. It is so helpful that your husband is out of town on this day.

Your sweet one is grieving. This is sorrow and loss and fear and trauma; it is visceral. It is devastating. You and your spouse are haunted, unshowered, unhinged, unmoored. You stare into each other’s eyes, begging the other one to fix this: What have we done? What are we doing? What are we going to do?

The house is a disaster. Your bios are huddled up in the corner, begging grandparents to come rescue them. You can’t talk to anyone. Everyone is still beaming at you, asking: “Isn’t this the best thing?? Is this just the happiest time of your life?” You are starving for truth-tellers in adoption.You scour blogs and Yahoo groups, desperate for one morsel of truth, one brave person to say how hard this in and give you a shred of hope. You only find adorable pictures and cute stories, and you despair. You feel so alone. You’ve ruined your life. You’ve ruined your kids’ lives. Your marriage is doomed. Your adopted child hates you. You want to go back to that person pining away in the Pre-Stage and punch her in the liver.


This pretty much describes our lives right now.  One minute, you're being sweet and cuddly and loving.  The next you are slapping me across the face or freaking out in Walgreens.  You'll get all excited to go somewhere (and so will I) and then  you just can't handle it.  I keep trying to remind myself that it isn't about me.  It's about you and your process.  

There are so many things that I wish in this phase:

*I wish you had more language.  

*I wish you could explain to me what you need or want.

*I wish I knew what you were thinking and feeling.  

*I wish I knew in that moment if you were feeling mad, sad, hurt, abandoned, scared, insecure.  

*I wish I could tell when you are genuinely upset about something and when you are just being defiant.

*I wish I didn't have to go to work every day so you could sleep until you were ready to get up.

*I wish I knew how much English you understand.  For that matter, I wish I knew Spanish you understand.

*I wish I knew what you really think about your new life.  (Or maybe sometimes I don't....)

*I wish you could tell me about your day at school.  Maybe that's playing into frustrations some days.  

*I wish I knew if you were grieving your old life.  

*I wish we could talk and reason through things.

*I wish you could understand why I set limits and correct you.

*I wish you would stop biting.  

*I wish you could feel secure in your new life.

*I wish I knew if you know how much I love you.  

Until the Spaz-Out phase ends, and until you get more language, I will continue to love you the best I know how.  I will strive to enjoy the sweet moments and seek to understand what you need in the rough moments. I will continue to remind us both that this phase won't last forever.  

I love you, Bug!

Tu Mama

Resolution....For Now

I knew going in to parenthood that I would be battling for my child all her life.  After all, I battled for a year to get her home.    I just didn't know the battles would start so soon.

I had some "surprise" issues come up with the school last week.  (You can read about them here).  They were so easy to work with when I was enrolling Sara.  I had hoped that would continue for a while.  While things aren't adversarial, I'm not as impressed with them as I was.

The issues came up at a meeting last Tuesday.  The social worker and I were the only ones at the meeting.  She said she would have to check with the director of special services about summer school and Sara's placement for next year.  I never heard back from her.  I emailed the director on Monday evening.  She's the only one I had contact information for.  I heard back from her immediately Tuesday morning.  I also got an email from the social worker with her contact information and direct line.  I guess someone didn't like that I went straight to the top.

The director told me that they hadn't offered summer school to Sara because they knew I wasn't working and didn't think I would want to send her.  What in the world  does my  job have to do with her education?  She tried to make it sound like she was doing me a favor by allowing me to have that time with my child.  They'll have her 2 1/2 hours a day for 20 days.  I'll have her the other 1,798 hours of my vacation.

We still haven't completely settled the Kindergarten issue but I'm kind of ok with it.  She will go full time in the fall.  She'll be in both the morning and afternoon Early Childhood classes.  She'll go to Kindergarten for Creative Movement (Gym), lunch, and recess.  The school hasn't ruled out her ability to "repeat" Kindergarten the following year.  If she's ready, I'd love for her to do a year of inclusion Kindergarten.  If she's not, this whole argument becomes a moot point.  Because of that, I've decided to wait a year to have this "fight."  She's only been in school a month.  No one can know where she'll be a year from now.  If she's ready for Kindergarten, I will fight for that with all the resources I have.  If she's not, we'll cross that bridge then.  I really don't see the point of continuing to fight about something that won't happen for another year and may not happen at all.

So, for now, I feel like I've won this little battle.  I know that a war rages on in front of me.  All I can do is continue fighting the battles as they appear before me


And just for fun, here are some recent pics:

Praying at her dedication

Looking way too old.

Ready for her first 5k!

Proving you CAN lick your elbow.

With Tia Anna's hat at Lauren's shower.  

Cake!

My fashionista!

Meet Monet

Updated September 4, 2013:  It is with a heavy heart that I report that Monet is now in the arms of her heavenly Father.  Her struggle here on earth has ended.  

How beautiful is this child?  And how sad does she look?  She's not even 3 yet!!!  3-year-olds should be playing and laughing; not looking like they carry the weight of the world.  I hope she doesn't wait much longer for a family.  She has some health concerns that could be properly treated in the US.

Here is the description of her on her Reece's Rainbow page:

Girl, born July 2010

CO-A

Beautiful Monet is currently diagnosed with Profound Bilateral Neurosensory Hypoacusis, and has had meningitis and encephalomalacia, contributing to her partial deafness and form of epilepsy.   Full medical and social history available.

I have had some online conversations with a family that was hoping to adopt Monet.  Her epilepsy is well controlled with medicines.  Her deafness is the kind that could be addressed with cochlear implants.  (Of course, a potential family should have her file reviewed by an adoption doctor or their pediatrician.)  

I have heard a lot of Monet's story.  It's heartbreaking.  She has been through so much in her young life.  I think you can see it in her eyes.  This little girl needs a family before she gives up hope!  She needs to get into therapies, learn some sign language, get the medical care she needs, start school.  She needs a chance at life!  

She would be an amazing addition to a family.  If you've followed the blog and thought, I could do that or I want to do that or I'd like to help someone else do that, now is your chance.  

*Monet has $536.50 in her grant currently.  This isn't a great start.  If you'd like to make a tax-deductible donation, you can do so here.  

*If you order something during the month of May from my Scarves and Skirts for Sara page, you can choose for 50% of the sale price to go to Monet's grant.  

*If you are interested in adopting Monet, or another child with special needs, you can find out more at Reece's Rainbow New Family Info page.    The specific requirements to adopt Lene's country are:  (She is also in Latin America.) 

• Single heterosexual parents may adopt
• No family size restrictions
• Both parents must travel to the country and stay until completion of adoption — approx 5-7 weeks (one parent may leave after a week or two)
• Estimated total cost $21,000-24,500

Don't you want to see what she looks like with a smile on her face?

Reality

I've always said that I would be open and honest on my blog.  While I don't want to discourage potential adoptive parents or scare anyone away, adoption is not all butterflies and rainbows.  It's hard.  Hard to the point that this week, I started to wonder if I had made the biggest mistake of my life.

If you are one of those people that doesn't want to hear anything negative about adoption, you probably want to stop reading now.  

If you want to know what the realities of day-to-day life CAN be like, keep reading.  (Disclaimer:  Every family and child is different.  Sara's adjustment has gone incredibly well.  There are much harder stories out there.  It's still hard!)  

I thought it was funny that Sara was considered an "older" child when I started this process.  She's only 4.  That's not old.  Much older kids get adopted all the time.

Four years old means four years of habits, behaviors, aggressive acts, lack of limits, etc., that have to be corrected.  

Sara was well taken care of.  I will always be grateful for that.  However, she was moved a lot.  Her last placement let her become very independent but I don't think there was a lot of structure.  I have a very strong feeling that the theory was "Sara is special and cute."  I'm pretty sure she was allowed to do almost anything she wanted.  She doesn't really care to be told no.  (What kid does?)  She always wants to be the start of the show and the center of attention.  (Sometimes it's cute.  Sometimes it's inappropriate.)  If you say no to her being the center of attention, she WILL have something to say about it.

Sara's biggest issue is her communication skills.  She's learning a lot of English but she doesn't speak any.  (Except for Hi, Bye, and Cow.)  Even in Spanish, her communication is very delayed.  The developmental pediatrician told me on Monday that I should no longer be speaking Spanish to her since she's only getting English at school.  He said it was confusing her and delaying her English.  I tried it this week and saw a huge increase in behaviors.  She's understanding a lot but I think maybe she sees home as a safe haven where she doesn't have to try so hard to understand and be understood.  (I know that when I've been around Spanish speakers all day, I yearn to speak English and I understand and speak both languages.)  I went back to Spanish this weekend (after I developed this theory) and we've had a much better weekend than week.

Sara does not function well when she hasn't gotten enough sleep.  Neither does her mommy.  The last two weeks have been crazy busy with a bunch of new experiences.  We've been up late at night and early in the morning.  Our current work/school schedule doesn't allow for good nap times.  By the end of the week, we are both tired and tend to get frustrated with each other.

I've come to the conclusion that Sara has some minor sensory issues.  She doesn't like loud noises.  She is scared of the vacuum cleaner and the lawn mower.  We went to a Mexican restaurant last night.  They were making drinks in a blender.  She plugged her ears every time.  We went to an event at work on Thursday.  There were tons of people there and the walls were covered with art work.  This particular event has always overwhelmed me a little bit.  Sara could not handle it.  We lasted 17 minutes.  She was hiding under tables, behind curtains, in bathrooms.  It was just too much.  She was also hitting, biting, head butting. (The head butting was new.  I haven't seen that before.)  

Sara is an amazing child who happens to hit and bite and yell.  I didn't see a lot of these behaviors in Colombia.  I saw none of them when we first came home.  I've seen more this month than the previous three combined.  The honeymoon is over!

There are a lot of reasons that this frustrates me and makes me doubt myself and my decisions:
*No one else ever sees these behaviors.  Everyone thinks she's just the greatest, cutest thing ever and that our life together is perfect.
*I teach young adults with special needs.  I know what happens when kids don't learn boundaries and limits early.  I know how people judge the parents of kids with behavior issues.  I don't want to be that parent.
*I wonder sometimes if another, better family would have come along for Sara.  One that has two parents.  One that has experience raising a child with Down syndrome.  One that can afford more therapies, counseling, etc for her.
*Her behaviors are getting worse; not better.  Am I making them worse?  Am I doing something wrong?  What if they never go away?  Am I prepared to deal with being hit for the next 40 years?
*Are we going to survive 11 weeks of summer together 24/7?  Is it going to help us bond or kill us both?

Let me just say that I'm not expecting comments or texts or phone calls or emails telling me what a great job I'm doing.  I'm not as depressed or hopeless as I sound.  (We actually had a great day!)  These are just the thoughts, feelings, and doubts that occasionally run through my head.  I just want to get this out there.  I want adopting parents to know that hard days will come.  I want other adoptive parents to know that they aren't the only ones with doubts.

At the end of the day, I love my daughter with all my heart.  She has added so much to my life already.  She is learning and growing and changing.  She's amazing.  And, like every other human being, she has her struggles and her bad days.  Her mommy does, too!  

We will continue to struggle through this adjustment together.  We'll continue to take each day as it comes.  We will continue to remember that we are a family now and that we love each other no matter what.  

School Disagreements

I got a call last week asking me to come in and discuss the plan for Sara's education next year.  The social worker said, that because she will be 5 in August, they wanted her to go to the early childhood class in the morning; to Kindergarten for creative moment (gym), lunch, and recess; and to return to her current early childhood class in the afternoon.  I said that sounded like a good plan.  She's got some catching up to do and can use all the help she can get.  Having her spend some time with the Kindergarteners would help us now if she's ready for K next year.  My only concern at that point was her ability to handle a full day.  She's so tired now with a half day.  I'm worried that she will be so tired in the afternoon that it will be counterproductive for her to be there and they will start to see some negative behaviors.  Of course, as soon as I hung up the phone, I had a long list of questions.

When I dropped her off on Tuesday, the other moms were asking me if Sara was going to summer school.  Huh.  The school never mentioned summer school.....  (I've never dropped Sara off at school.  Guess I picked the right day to do it.)  I now had two issues to bring up at the meeting.

The meeting was just the social worker and I.  Not a full team.  I knew that going in but that was before I had so many questions.  I'm wishing now there had been someone there with the authority to actually make decisions.

The social worker seemed surprised I was interested in summer school.  I don't know that Sara will be there every single day but she can use all the help she can get.  She's only been in this country for 2 months.  She's still learning the language.  How would they not think she would benefit from summer school?  She said she would have to ask the sped director.

I asked about next year.  I still have a hope that Sara will be ready for inclusion Kindergarten the year she is six.  I know that she isn't anywhere near ready right now.  She's only been in school for a month.  Who's to say she won't be ready next year?  How can you tell that in a month?  I would like her in the full day preschool program next year and inclusion Kindergarten when she's 6.  I was afraid, though, that by putting her in full day next year, they would count that as her K year and move her to 1st grade the next year--which she won't be ready for.  I feel like they are trying to track her into separate classes for the rest of her life.  Let's give the poor girl a fighting chance!!!

I was told that district policy is to not hold kids back.  Kids must stay with their same-age peers.  I understand the need for policy and the need for rules.  I also understand the need for exceptions.  They will probably not ever run into a case like Sara's again.  They won't be setting some future precedent by making this "exception."

I'm waiting to hear back from the sped director.  She was great to work with when I was enrolling Sara.  I hope it continues to be that way.  If not, I think I still have the option to keep her in half day preschool next year.  I think.  I do know that I have a few people waiting in the wings to help me out if it comes to that.  I really hope it doesn't.  I'd hate to have an adversarial relationship so quickly!

Before and After

Warning:  Lots of numbers coming.  I love numbers.  

A lot of times, with international adoptions, you see drastic "Before and After" pictures.  I love those pictures.  I love seeing children saved from near-death conditions and thriving in families.  No one can doubt that these children needed families and love and medical care.

Sara's situation wasn't drastic.  She wasn't starving.  She wasn't abused.  By all standards, she was developing well.  I dare say, she was loved by her care-givers in the orphanage.  But here is something I know:

When Sara was 2 years old, she weighed 26 1/2 pounds and was 34 1/2 inches tall.

In June of 2012, she was 36 inches tall.

In October 2012, she was 36 inches tall and weighed 30 pounds.  

It took her almost 2 1/2 years to grow an inch and a half and gain 3 1/2 pounds!

When we she went to the pediatrician in March (10 days after arriving in the US; 2 months after meeting her mommy), she was 34 pounds and 37 1/2 inches tall.

In 5 months, she had grown an inch and a half and gained 4 pounds!

Today, at the developmental pediatrician, she was 38 1/2 inches tall and 37 pounds.

In 2 months, she has grown an inch and gained 4 pounds!  

Numbers don't lie.  This girl was not starving.  She was not neglected.  She also wasn't growing.  

See what love can do?

My Fund Raising Philosophy

I write on my blog for a lot of reasons.  Sometimes I write to keep people updated on our lives.  Sometimes I write to advocate for others kids and families.  Sometimes I write letters to my little girl.  Sometimes I write to help out other families who are in process or who may be.  Sometimes I write because there is something rattling around in my head that I want to get out.  This is one of those rattling times.

I realize that just by writing this I will probably offend some people.  That is not my intent.  My intent is just to get these ideas out of my head and on "paper."  These are just my opinions.  That's all.  I didn't think about my philosophy on fund raising before I started the adoption.  It's probably something people should think about when they are researching and making decisions.  

Let's just start by saying that I did fund raise for my adoption.  I paid for about a third of the adoption on my own.  (I used my savings and worked summer school to earn extra money.)  I received grants for about a third of the cost.  I fund raised the other third.

There are people that fall on all points of the fund raising spectrum.  One of my first blog comments was from someone who informed me that I should have saved the $30,000 that I needed before I started the process. After all, they said, people save for cars and houses, why not adoptions.  (I know no one that paid cash for their house.)  It seems that there are also people that fall on the other end of the spectrum.  There are people that fund raise every single expense of the adoption.  (I've seen people fund raise for the cost of postage to mail documents.)  I fall somewhere in the middle.  I had some money in savings and I used that for upfront costs and incidentals.

Fund raising is a verb.  It implies action.  I worked my butt off fund raising and paying for the adoption.   I worked summer school in order to have an influx of cash when I needed it.  (I realize that isn't always an option for people but I think everyone who is fund raising should consider how they can earn extra money.)  I baby sat.  I even dog sat.  (I hate animals.)  I knit and sold items until I didn't like knitting any more.  I planned fund raisers.  I'm sure I alienated some facebook friends in the process but I was actively fund raising.

Never once did I say, "I need x amount to make my next payment.  If ten people give X amount, I can pay for the next step."  That's just not how I think things should go.  (That doesn't mean that I never got donations outside of my fundraisers.  I did.  I just never asked for them.)  I feel like people should get something for their donation.  I held auctions, sold t-shirts, sold coffee, made items to sell.  The only fund raiser that I held that didn't have a direct return for each donation was the give away.  (In all honesty, I wouldn't do another one.)  I just like the idea that people get something for their gift.

I also think part of fundraising is applying for grants.  Yes--They are a lot of work.  No--You won't qualify for every one that is out there.  Yes--It's more paper chasing.  No--You won't get every grant you apply for.  BUT, there are TONS of grants out there.  There are legitimate organizations that want to GIVE you money.  How can you turn down the opportunity for free money?  Someone else has already done all the fund raising.  All you have to do is ask!

I don't have all the answers.  I know that.  I was blessed with incredible support.  My process was never in jeopardy because I lacked funds to continue.  I just needed to get out what has been in my head.  That was my only goal and motivation.  If it made someone start thinking about their own philosophy, great.  If not, fine.

(On a side note, I will financially support families that are actively fund raising.  I just can't bring myself to donate to people who aren't doing anything to help themselves get closer to their goal.)  

Revealing

One of my biggest internal struggles since being home is how much of our story to reveal to strangers and new people in our lives.  It's rare that we actually meet people who don't know anything about our story.  (Even the eye doctor knew who we were before we got there.)  Medical professionals need to know.  It's relevant to her story.  The school knows because, again, it's relevant to her current status.  I'm talking more about people that we run into randomly or rarely.

For example, we went to a bridal shower on Sunday.  The bride, maid of honor, and their mothers know Sara's story.  I didn't have a problem with them sharing it.  I'm just not sure if I'll still want people sharing it with everyone in a year or two.  (Maybe the novelty will wear off and people won't care any more.)  The waitress was asking a lot of questions---mainly because Anna and I were speaking Spanish to Sara.  She asked if Sara knew any English---that it was "freaking the busboy" out that we were speaking Spanish to her.  I didn't really give her any info.  I just told her that Sara doesn't speak any English for now.

Another example:  We hung out with three other mom/kid pairs at the zoo.  During lunch, I was chatting with one of the moms.  She was asking lots of questions about different things.  I mentioned having to chaperone prom.  She said "Oh, you and your husband?"  I answered with "just me."  I know what she was getting at but I just didn't want to answer more questions.  She also asked if we had just moved to this town.  She seemed surprised when I said no.  Her response was "I'm surprised Sara wasn't in this class before now."  It would have been easy to say why but I just changed the topic of conversation.

I won't hide from Sara that she's adopted.  I'm just not sure how free I should be with other people when it comes to that information.  Some of it is that I don't want to hear how wonderful I am.  The other part is that I feel like Sara should just be Sara---not some poor orphan that was rescued from poverty and an orphanage.  That was her life before.  Now, she is my daughter.  It's that simple.

Zoo Trip 2 - Lincoln Park Zoo

On Friday, I chaperoned a field trip that Sara's class took to the zoo.  There are about 8 kids in each the morning and afternoon class but only 5 kids went.  Each had a parent with them.  To be honest, I'm not really sure what the school staff did all day since we all had our own kids.

Half asleep but ready to go.

Sara was SUPER confused by the whole situation.  I told her we were going to the zoo with friends.  We went to school in the morning.  (She goes in the afternoon.)  We took her harness (which she wears on the bus) and that just about put her over the edge.  When we got to school, the secretaries (who apparently love her) took her back to the room and left me in the office.  By the time I got to her room, she was crying in the aide's lap.  (She is not a crier.)  She was INCREDIBLY clingy and whiny until we got settled on the bus.

We spent the day with three other kids from her class and their moms.  It was nice to get to know some local moms a little bit.  I know very few people in my town.  I just haven't had a reason to meet too many people until now.  

Look how tiny my girl is!  All those kids are almost 5.

The two girls.  How cute are they?

It was pretty cold and rainy but the kids had a good time.  (We parents were much whinier about it than the kids.)  Sara spent a lot of time trying to get everyone to put their hoods up.

I don't think she's ever used an umbrella before.  She was kind of dangerous.  

The polar bear was not her favorite part.  She was in between those two kids but fled when he got so close.  

Her favorite part was definitely chasing the pigeons.  If that girls gets any faster, I'll never be able to catch her.  I wish I could have taken video.  The look of pure joy on her face and her crazy giggle were priceless.  I was too busy trying to keep up to be able to take pictures or video, though.

The tree house was also a highlight.  She made it all the way through but backed up traffic quite a bit.  The teacher/mom in me really had to hold back so I didn't yell at every kid that plowed over her while she decided where to go next.  Rude!!!  She had a pretty good meltdown when I pulled her out at the end.  She was going to turn around and head back in.  Fortunately, it was just about time to head to the bus.  I think a full day was just too much for her.  

Overall, I would call it a success.  (My shoulders and back beg to differ right now.  I'm not used to carrying 35lbs!)  I had some interesting thoughts, realizations, and conversations that I'll share in another post.  (Like how much of our story to share with new people, moms talking about how they were done having kids since they were already 35,  and how far behind my girlie really is.)  For now, I'm going to bed.  I'm still tired from that trip.

The Secret Club

A continuation of the zoo post from the other day:

When we got to the zoo on Sunday, we saw that there was a table set up for Autism Speaks and the place was crazy crowded.  Apparently, it was Zoos Go Blue across the country.  (I'll admit.  My first thought had to do with the fact that it was Sunday and I wasn't at work and didn't want to see any of my students.)

As the day went on, we saw tons of kids with different disabilities.  I tend to notice kids in general but I definitely notice kids with disabilities.  I always want to stop and talk to their families and encourage them.  Taking your child into multiple settings and giving them as many life experiences as possible is one of the best things you can do for any child.

I noticed an interesting phenomenon as the day wore on.  Every child or adult that we passed with Down syndrome stared at Sara.  Most of the time when I look at her, I just see a beautiful little girl.  I don't see the Down syndrome characteristics.  Maybe they are immediately apparent to others but I just don't see them most of the time.  One young man stared and waved when she had her sunglasses on.  (This really surprised me.  How can he tell if he can't see her eyes?)  Somehow, they all just know.  They are part of a special club and they instantly recognize the other members.

When Katie did Sara's photo shoot, her daughter and Sara instantly bonded.  Katie said that Grace is usually upset when people come to get photos done.  That was not the case with us.  Grace and I played while Sara took pics.  Then Grace and Sara took some beautiful photos together.  They'd never met but they became immediate friends.

Years ago, I took my students to the flagship McDonalds restaurant in the western suburbs.  There was a young woman working there.  I think she was cleaning tables or sweeping the floor or something.  One of my students came up to me very excited and said:  "She's just like me."  Yep.  The both had Down syndrome.


I also love the camaraderie that comes from other moms.   I first experienced it in Colombia when we ran into a young woman with Down syndrome and her mom in the market.  Her mom gave me a nod and a smile that let me know I'm in my own secret club now.  I experienced the same thing at the zoo last week.  The kids have their club but so do the parents.

The other day, Sara and I got to visit the site of the new Gigi's Playhouse that is opening in Oak Forest in the fall.  I am facebook friends with the woman who is starting it but I haven't actually met her.  We stopped by to drop off some donations and I instantly felt at home.  Sara was instantly embraced and so was I.  I can't wait for the center to actually open!  Until then, I'll enjoy the waves, nods, and smiles of the secret clubs Sara and I belong to.

The Zoo!

One of my friends at work has a season's pass to the zoo.  It was beautiful on Sunday so we took our kids at spent a few hours at the zoo.  I'm chaperoning a field trip to the zoo for Sara's class tomorrow.  I'm glad we got to check it out first and I got to get a read on how it would go.

This is her reaction to the announcement that we were going to the zoo.  I seriously don't think she knew what the zoo was.  I think she just heard "going."  

Checking out the frogs.  

Mr. Brian wouldn't let her climb over the wall and swim with the sea lions.  She's telling him what she thinks about that.  

It's probably safer if we hold her lower.  

I realized that pretty much all zoo pictures are from behind.  

One of the very few times she was actually in the stroller.  

We were always trying to get her to stand one rung down from where she wanted to be.  

Agua

Stop climbing the fences!

She really liked the zoo.  She didn't wear her glasses but seemed to be seeing all the animals.  She would look around and then point and declare "wow-wow."  There is no convincing her that all animals are not dogs.  She was petrified of a statue of a walrus and refused to eat lunch.  Overall, it was a great day.  She was asleep before we got out to the main road to get home.  

It's going to be a great summer.