Egg My Yard

A team from North Darien Bible Church will be traveling this summer to serve with Foundation for His Ministry in Baja, California, Mexico.  As part of our fund raising efforts, we are Egging Yards for Easter.

EGG MY YARD!

Support the North Darien Bible Church Mission Trip to Mexico.

Order your candy-filled eggs to be delivered to your yard for Easter morning fun!

Contact Natalie Keller at ntkeller08@gmail.com to order.

15 eggs for $10

25 Eggs for $15

50 Eggs for $30

100 Eggs for $50

You can check out more about our Missions Trip at www.facebook.com/BajaSummerTrip

If you'd like to order, you can fill out the form by clicking here.  

You can donate to our trip by clicking here.

Orphan Sunday

What is Orphan Sunday?
Orphan Sunday is the second Sunday of November.  It's a day that the church is supposed to stand for the orphan and remember that God commanded us to care for those in need.  Now, before you stop reading because I said "the church," please know that I have very mixed feelings about that.  The church clearly is not doing enough to care for orphans and I hate the implication that only Christians care about orphans and foster children.  That certainly is not true.  Plenty of people are involved in orphan care and foster care without believing in God and plenty of Christians are not involved at all.  This blog post is not about Christians or the church.  It's about helping kids in need of families!!!  


What is the Orphan Crisis?
Here are some stats that I took from The Orphan Foundation.  Statistics can be twisted and there is a lot of discussion about how many orphans there really are.  How many of those are true orphans and how many are social orphans?  However, no matter how you look at it, the stats aren't good and the futures of children without families are bleak.
*There are 143,000,000 orphans in the world.
*There are an additional 20,000,000 “displaced children” in the world.
*The combined count of these categories makes the orphan population the 7th largest nation on the planet – slightly larger than the population of Russia.
*In Eastern Europe, less than 50% of the orphan population will live to see their 20th birthdays.
*In Eastern Europe, of the orphans that survive their 20th birthdays, 50% will end up in organized crime, drugs, or prostitution.
*In Africa, homeless children are armed and used for war.
*In Africa, there is a concerted effort to extend children’s lives beyond 5 years of age.
*In the US, 25,000 children will leave the foster care system without families.
*25% of these foster children become homeless.
*56% of these emancipated foster care children enter the unemployment ranks.
*27% of the emancipated male children in foster care end up in jail.
*30% of the emancipated females in foster care experience early parenthood.
*30,000 children in foster care are simply dropped from state care because they have run away.
*In the US, most young adults ages 18 – 24 still live at home with their parents, while approximately 25,000 children are annually released at age 18 from the foster care system without families to support them.”

Can we agree that there is a crisis both domestically and internationally?  If you still need some visual proof, check out my friend's facebook page.  She just brought home a 10 pound, 7 year old!  10 pounds!!  At 7!!!  We have a problem!


I'm just not in a position to adopt or foster.  What can I do to help?
Help foster children/families:
*Call your local agency and ask what you can do to help.  They may need someone to help with paperwork.  (Most caseworkers are overworked and underpaid.  They'd probably love to have someone help them out with office tasks.)  They may need Christmas gifts or clothes.  They might need someone to go into a group home and give the kids good hair cuts.  You'll never know what they need if you don't ask.
*Check in with a foster family if you know one.  See what you can do to help them out.  Offer to bring them dinner when a new child moves in.  Offer to take their other kids out for a day/evening so they can spend some time with the new child.  Offer to collect clothes or supplies for their new child.
 *Offer to teach an older foster child a skill or trade.  The fate of foster children who age out of the system are not good.  Give them a leg up and maybe a job!
*Donate.  The Dave Thomas Foundation is probably the most well know organization that helps foster children become part of a permanent family.  Together We Rise provides duffle bags to children in foster care so they don't have to move their meager possessions in garbage bags.  I'm sure there are many others as well.

Help orphanages:  (Most of my examples come from Foundation For His Ministry in Mexico since I used to work for them and know that they are reputable.  I'm sure you can google and find similar programs in orphanages all over the world.)
*Helping orphanages can be tricky.  There are lots of mixed feelings about the benefits/harm that comes from outsiders visiting orphanages.  While we all want to help and "love on" children, that may not be the best way to help.  (That's another whole post for another day.)  If you do decide to visit an orphanage, please make sure you do so with a reputable organization that works in the area and knows the culture.  There are also lots of opportunities to use the skills you possess to support those who are permanently working in an orphanage.  Teams of skilled laborers, medical professionals and other skills are often accepted for specific projects.
*You can also help orphanages financially.
     *Sponsor a child.
     *Sponsor a permanent staff member.
     *Support a specific project.
     *Consider finding an Alternative Giving program that allows you to make donations to       charities instead of purchasing Christmas presents.
     *Consider having a contest at your child's school, children's church program, or club            to raise funds for an orphanage.

Help orphans:
*Through Reece's Rainbow, it's possible to help specific orphans.  RR raises grants for waiting children who are seeking their families.  The cost of adoption is huge.  Sometimes, knowing that some of the money has already been raised will help a family step forward and take the leap of faith to adopt.  Right now I'm working to raise Andre's adoption grant to lighten the financial burden for his future family. Some adoption agencies have similar programs.

Help adopting families:
*Adoption is incredibly expensive.  You can make tax-deductible donations to individual adopting families through Reece's Rainbow, AdoptTogether and several other organizations.There are also a lot of adoption fundraisers on sites like GoFundMe but those families aren't verified and donations aren't tax deductible.
*Support family fund raisers.  If you can't afford to support them, share them.  You never know who might be looking to buy some hand knit scarves or Avon.
*If you want to make sure that your money is going to carefully vetted families, donate to a reputable grant organization like Show Hope.
*Call an adopting family and check in.  The process is hard and exhausting and sometimes isolating.  Call and let them know you were thinking about them and their child.

Help prevent children from becoming social orphans:  (Social orphans are those that have one or more living parents who are not involved in their care.  Usually this is due to extreme poverty, disability or addiction.)  Adoption is a plan B for children.  It is born of loss and should be a last resort.  Above all, we should be working to keep children with their biological families and their culture if at all possible.  Here are some organizations that are working to do that.  I'm sure there are many more.
Eternal Anchor - Working in Baja California Mexico.  They have established a day care/school for children with disabilities.  This gives their families training and allows the children to continue to live with their biological families instead of being placed in a children's home or orphanage.
Mission to Ukraine - Working in Ukraine.  They work with families of children with disabilities.  They provide training and education to help families raise their children with disabilities.  They also provide summer camp experiences to kids.
Compassion International - Compassion works all over the world.  They work through a sponsorship model but it's so much more.  They work with the entire family and community to affect long term change.  Their goal is to develop leaders in their own community and culture,

What can you do to help?  Everyone should consider opening their home to a child in need.  If you can't open your home, at least consider opening your heart and helping somehow.  This problem isn't going away.  It's in our backyards and it's around the world.  What will you do to help?

If you are interested in adoption, foster care, or Safe Families, please let me know and I will hook you up with resources, families, and agencies.  I love to talk about adoption.  Encouraging and helping families in their journey is one of my favorite things to do.  

Have a Child with Down Syndrome, Will Travel

Last week, I took the munchkin to Mexico.  It wasn't her first trip there.  I've had a few comments since then that range from "Wow!  You're brave!" to "I could never do that with my kid" to "You must be crazy!"  Let me address those.  I am definitely a little crazy and maybe brave.  And, in my opinion, you can do that with your kid and you should!  (I obviously don't know every single family dynamic or child but I think the vast majority of kids (special needs or not) should be traveling or at least getting out of their comfort zone.)  

In Sara's first 18 months home, she had been in 18 states. She's added at least two new ones since then.  I don't say that to brag.  I say that because traveling is obviously something I enjoy.  I was worried that she would change that but she really hasn't.  She loves to fly and is a road trip warrior.  Obviously that makes it easier to travel with her.  She's seen both the Atlantic and Pacific Oceans.  She's been in more airports than I can count.  She's been to Mexico 3 times.  If I want to go, we go.

Now, is traveling with her easy?  No.  Does she always enjoy it?  No.  She's not a big fan of Mexico.  It triggers things in her that are hard for her to deal with.  But she's getting better!!!  It took her until Wednesday this time to start asking when she'd go home.  Do the positives outweigh the negatives?  Absolutely.  

Positives:
1.   She gets out of her comfort zone.  Sara is perfectly happy to stay home, eat goldfish crackers, and watch her ipad.  Forever.  While this is fine on an occasional Saturday, she needs to experience more in life.

2.  If I don't get her used to traveling now, I'll never be able to travel again.  I'm a single mom.  It's just the two of us.  If I ever want to travel again, I need to train my travel partner when she's young.  Not when she's 18 or 28 and "mature enough to handle it."  By then, she'll be permanently planted in front of Disney Junior and I'll never get her out of the house.

3.  She's learning that mommy is a constant no matter where she goes.  When a child has moved around a lot, they need to learn that home is the person and not the place.  She needs to be attached to me and not her things or her space.  Mommy travels with you and always stays with you.

4.  Life experiences.  Kids (and adults) can learn more from life experiences than they ever can in a classroom or from a book (so says this teacher)!  Give your kids life experiences---even if they may be a little uncomfortable at first.

5.  Especially in international travel, you have the chance for others to see that having a disability is ok and that a child with Down syndrome can be part of a family.  It seems to so simple to us but it's not in so many parts of the world.  We encountered kids who were both kind and cruel to Sara.  It's hard to watch but it's educating people who just don't see kids with special needs around them.

Negatives:
1.  Sara tends to wet her pants when she gets overwhelmed and frustrated.  It's not the worst behavior ever but it takes some extra planning on my part.  I have to have lots of extra clothes on me at all times.  And I end up with a suitcase full of nasty dirty clothes.  But it is what it is.  She does it at home sometimes as well.

2.  It's exhausting.  Three days later and I'm still exhausted.  I got up, put Sara on the bus and went back to bed for two hours.  Managing all of her needs while adjusting to time changes and just being on the go for a week is tiring.  There's no way around it.

3.  It can be hard to keep up the pace of the rest of the group.  You may have to miss out on certain activities because it's just too much.  It's ok to take an afternoon and nap or swim or chill in your hotel room.  Just make sure you aren't doing that the whole time!

4.  Your child may not be welcomed or accepted every where you go.  It's hard to experience but it's true, especially if you travel internationally.  People may point or stare or ask awkward questions.  Try your best not to take it personally or to go on the offensive.  Lots of people just don't know any better.  (It hurts.  It just does.  Try to wait until after your child is in bed for the night to cry about it.)  Just to be clear, the number of kind, welcoming, accepting people has far outweighed the ignorant, unkind ones in our travels.  But those negative interactions tend to stick in my head.    


Tips:

1.  Travel with people who know and love your child.  I fly alone with Sara but we are always meeting people on the other end that love and adore her (and me).  I'm sure that there are people who take trips with their child alone.  I'm just not one of them.  Having support of friends and family that love us is invaluable to me.  It keeps me sane when things get tough.  It's nice to know that at least one person will hang back with you when you fall behind the group or wait for you while she goes to the bathroom for the millionth time or bring you breakfast in the airport when you haven't slept all night.

2.  Know that it will be hard.  Vacations are no longer relaxing for me.  I used to listen to music and read on the plane.  And on the beach.  Now I'm making sure she has everything she needs and giving her my phone to keep her happy.  I'm squishing into little plane bathrooms (because she loves them) and swimming in the ocean.  It's not about me.  It's about her having experiences and being happy.  I know that going in.

3.  Plan things that are both in and out of your child's comfort zone.  I'm all for Sara experiencing new things but I also know she needs some time in her comfort zone.  For example, instead of tacos every night, I made sure we went to a restaurant where she could get a hot dog.  She needs some familiar in her unfamiliar.  (Don't we all?)

4.  Start when they are little.  Start when they are smaller and portable.  Get them used to traveling early.  It will only get harder as they are older.

5.  Be prepared for the negative behavior.  Expect it.  We were gone for 8 days.  I took 12 pairs of shorts and underwear for her.  (It was still not enough. Ugh.)  I knew she would have at least one major meltdown.  I usually still take her stroller and her noise cancelling headphones.  I fly with a HUGE backpack of everything she could possibly need.  I try to be prepared for every possibility.  (I was not prepared for the headphones to break on the first day.)  

6.  Schedule some down time when you get home.  When it was just me, I used to fly on a Sunday night and work on Monday morning.  (Or sometimes fly on Monday morning and go straight to work.)  I don't do that anymore.  I know that we will both need some recovery time after a trip.  Some down time in our comfort zones.

I don't have all the answers and I don't get everything right.  I just believe that if you ever want to be able to travel with your child, you should start young.  Go to the places you want them to experience.  And then buckle up because it will be a bumpy ride but so worth it!

This group was so helpful to me last week.  

If you want to see more about our trip, you can check out our Facebook page.

Missions Trip

In 2003, I went on my first missions trip with Park Community Church.  My sister had been many times and I was so excited to finally get to go.  (I mean...speaking Spanish, working with kids, Latin America.  Some of my favorite things!)  It was my first taste of the Mission at Foundation for His Ministry in Vicente Guerrero, Baja California, Mexico.  I was hooked.  I went back in 2004 with another team.

In 2005, I went for the summer.  I was now addicted.  I went every single break I had from school and spent the summers of 2006 and 2007 down there as well.  In 2008, I quit my job and moved down there to work in the Day Home with children with special needs.  I thought I'd be there forever but God had other plans.  (Namely, a little girl in Colombia.)  I came home in April 2009 and picked up my life where I had left off.

I didn't visit the mission again for quite some time.  I had some healing to do.  I've since been for a few days at a time but I haven't been back for a full week since 2009 and I haven't been as part of a team since 2004.  Until now.  From August 7-13, 2016, I will be leading a group from North Darien Bible Church to my favorite place on earth.  I can't wait to share this experience with some great people from a new chapter of my life.

Right now, we have a committed team of 5 (including Sara, my mother, and I) with quite a few possible team members.  I can't wait to see who ends up in the final group!

It seems a little odd to me to be fund raising for a trip I've made before but things are a little different (and a little more expensive) with a group.  (Although this is very reasonable compared to a lot of other trips.)   I'll also have the added responsibility of leading the group!  (I've lead senior trips to places like St Louis but I've never led a group on a missions trip.)

I'm waiting to hear if the team can accept tax-deductible donations through the church.  (We aren't an official church sponsored trip at this point.)  Until then, I have set up a youcaring link to accept donations for the trip if you feel led.  All donations are very appreciated.

I have a blog post with current fund raisers.  I'll update it up until the trip.  Please check it out!  

More than anything, I ask for your prayers.  I've never led a missions trip before.  This is all new to me.  It's definitely different than planning a vacation or leading a school trip.  Pray for the right people to join the team.  Pray for safety.  Pray for the team members hearts as well as the people we minister to.  Pray for the staff at the mission.

Want to see a little more of what we'll be doing?  Check out this video!  (It was made when I was living there!)  

You can follow our journey on our Facebook page!  

Baja Trip - Part 2

The second part of my Baja trip turned out nothing like I had planned but was still great. My main reason for going was to visit Angel and Martin - the two little boys that I worked with for the 8 months I lived there. When asked to describe it, I use words like bitter-sweet, great, boring, fun, healing, exciting, nice. You get the idea---lots of conflicting emotions.

This half of my trip started when I was dropped off at the bus station in Ensenada. The staff member from Genesis Diez wanted to wait with me for the bus to come but I assured her that I had taken the bus dozens of times and that I would be fine. I got there about 11:45, having just missed the 11:30 bus. I bought a ticket for the 1:00 bus. About 12:30, I went outside to wait for the bus. At 1, it still hadn't shown up. I asked and was told that it hadn't arrived yet. I asked again at 1:15, 1:30 and 1:45 and got the same response--not here yet. About 2:15, the 2:30 bus showed up. I asked the guy in a very American accent if he was going to Vicente Guerrero. He said that he was but tried to explain to me that this was not the bus that I had purchased a ticket for. The number on the bus and the number on my ticket didn't match up. I knew this, of course, but I pretended not to understand his Spanish at all. I finally smiled at him and just got on the bus. He was so flustered with me at that point, he let it slide. There was no way I was going to continue to wait for a bus that was apparently never going to come.

The walk from the bus station in VG to the mission is a mile down a dirt road. While I have taken the bus countless times, I have never made that entire walk. Someone always picks me up and this time was no exception. I was certainly glad to see Sean and Cristin at the corner--especially since Sean was the one that had arranged a trailer for me to stay in.

Saturday night I hung out with Kevin and Dan and got some yummy Quesatacos---something that you can't find in Chicago or Oaxaca.

Sunday I went to English church. After the service, Dirk and Mary took the visitors over to the new day home to see the amazing new building.

Sometimes, it seems like just yesterday that we were making a wish-list of things on the frig that we wanted in the new building someday. I loved seeing the new building but was saddened to learn that Dirk and Mary were leaving for a much-needed vacation that afternoon and that the program would be closed for the week.

I hung around after the rest of the group and had a really good conversation with Dirk and Mary. It was a very healing time for me and just, once again, confirmed to me that I am right where God wants me to be. My time in Mexico was for a purpose but it was also for a finite time. It's taken me a while to really get that truth. (Sometimes, I'm a little dense.)

After visiting with Dirk and Mary, I got the chance to catch up with my dear friend Sharon who happened to be visiting at the same time. I was thrilled when I learned she was going to be there.

Monday I got the chance to work in the clinic with a group of Eye Doctors that was there. I spent most of the day translating in the reading glasses room (while carrying around Kate--Cheryl's beautiful baby). It was a pretty simple job but I enjoyed it. I loved that almost everyone we talked to wanted (better) reading glasses so they could read their Bibles!

I floated to a few other areas when things got slow in the afternoon. I watched a bit of an eye surgery and did some consultations with one of the eye doctors. It was exciting to tell some of the people that their eyes were going to be fixed with surgery but very discouraging that a lot of people were beyond help. The dirt in Baja is very rough on the eyes. I was glad that there were better translators than I that had to deliver the really hard news to people.

After 9 hours in the clinic, I went out with Dan to visit some kids. On the way back from seeing "his" kids, we stopped to see Lupita. I can't believe how big she has gotten. I think I'll always get a little bit chocked up when I see her walking without her walker. I actually heard her coming but assumed it wasn't here since the person was running. How far she has come in 5 years! While I didn't get to see most of the kids I wanted to, her huge hug made the long bus ride all worth it!

A piece of my heart will always belong in Baja but I'm excited to see where I'll leave my next piece.

Next Trip: Amtrak through the night tonight to Buffalo, NY. Oh, boy!

My Week in Oaxaca

I had a 2 1/2 week gap in my summer that I had planned on filling with a trip to Oaxaca. I looked for tickets multiple times a day, every day, for months. The prices wouldn't budge and they were just too far out of my budget to be seriously considered. Last Thursday, I found a great price on a last minute ticket so I packed up and headed to Oaxaca late Monday night/early Tuesday morning.

My time in Oaxaca is generally pretty relaxing. I get to spend time with my sister and some of my favorite people from my time in Baja. Since my last visit, several new little baby boys have been added to the group. I spent a lot of time with each of them and with their amazing mothers. It was fun to both catch up with them and to relieve them of their adorable babies for a while so they could get their other jobs done.

The weather was not ideal. It poured every single day that I was there. (I definitely did not come back from Mexico tan!) Every morning and evening, I walked from the visitor center to the main part of the mission. It was always a little tricky to decide what the best path through all the mud was.

I brought so much mud back on my shoes I thought I should probably declare it at customs.

I am continually amazed at how quickly Celina is growing up. She's come so far since she was brought to the mission as a sickly baby. She has the best Spanglish I've ever heard. She can constantly be heard saying things like "Voy a teach him" or "Solo mi mama puede reach it" She defaults to Spanish until she doesn't know the word and then switches to English. I also love when she translates for herself. She was carrying a milk carton and told me: "Natalie, pesa mucho." I just looked at her because I didn't believe the little milk box was heavy. She then said "Is heavy." She will do the same thing if she asks you a question and you say no. She'll translate it to English hoping you didn't understand.
Celina: "Tia, miramos una peli?"
Janelle: "No. It's late."
Celina: "A movie, Tia!"

I had some minor issues with traveling:
*The security guy in Mexico took my contact solution because it was 105 ml and you are only allowed 100. Ugh! That stuff is expensive.
*I had some major delays in Atlanta yesterday but that's almost routine with me. At least they gave us food vouchers.
*I got sent to secondary inspection while going through Customs in Mexico City. The lady there mocked me for bringing coffee into a country known for its coffee.
*The Immigration guy in Atlanta asked me several times what I had purchased in Mexico. Apparently, he didn't believe me when I said absolutely nothing.

Next Trip: Baja!!!

I wonder if I could travel without packing....

I am surprisingly bad at packing. You would think I'd be good at it. I do it all the time. I'm not and I hate it. I've gotten better at packing my carry-on. I used to bring more things than I could possibly do in a flight. 3 or 4 books; magazines; ipod; snacks; portable dvd player; movies; work stuff---and whatever else I could fit in there. I now bring an ipod; 1 new book; 1 snack. My suitcase is another story.

Last June, Anna and I went to Costa Rica for 8 days. We knew that we would be bussing it and staying in hostels so we wanted to pack light. Plus, we had to be able to carry our backpacks. I packed a little better than Anna. (She somehow neglected to bring enough underwear.) We had both decided that we would only need one pair of jeans since we were going to a tropical country. We didn't realize that it would be cold and wet each night and we would need those jeans. We also needed them for zip-lining and horseback riding. Because it rained every night, EVERYTHING we owned was damp and would never dry. After the horseback riding day, the jeans were pretty rank and we paid dearly to do a load of laundry.

Even after the load of laundry, our luggage still stunk. I felt bad for the lady that had to search our bags at customs---and the friend that picked us up at the airport.

This trip was followed closely by a trip to Baja, Mexico for a wedding. We thought we knew how to pack for Baja. After all, we had both lived there. We know how hot it gets in July---except that this time it wasn't hot--at all. We froze. We both took cute little summer dresses to wear to the outdoor wedding. Then, we put hoodies over top of them until someone wanted to take a picture. We would peel off our layers, smile for the camera through our chattering teeth, and quickly re-layer. Packing failure strikes again.

My most recent packing failure involved my last trip to Oaxaca to visit my sister over spring break. She and I were spending a few days at a resort before going to the children's home where she lives. I had never been to a resort. (I travel a lot; I don't vacation.) I had no idea what to pack. I did know that I would need different clothes for both parts of the trip. I ended up WAY over packing. I didn't realize how much I had over packed until the airline lost my bag for 8 days. I had a multi-page list of items that were in that bag. I pretty much needed a whole new summer wardrobe. Thankfully, the bag was recovered after being declared hopelessly lost.

Maybe I should stop blogging and start packing....

Javier

The problem with traveling as much as I do is that I leave a piece of my heart everywhere I go. A huge part of me will also be in Vicente Guerrero, Mexico. The mission had a huge part in my life for almost 5 years. The amazing people I worked with and the wonderful children I got to serve will be in my heart forever.

Today, I mourn the loss of Javier. He was one of the first "students" in the day home and I'm sure the first one of the kids to introduce himself to me when I started working in there. Javier was probably the most genuine person I've ever met. He truly understood faith and love in a way that was amazing to watch.

By our standards, Javier had a very rough life. His family was poor. He and his brother both had Muscular Dystrophy. His mom wasn't around. The only time he ever left his house was to come to the program 4 days a week. Despite all the odds being stacked against him, Javier was one of the happiest people I've ever met. He got genuinely excited each day when he saw his friends--and everyone was his friend. He loved to talk about God and loved to sing praise songs. He had an amazing faith that was and is an example to us all.

Javier joins Katy and Krzysztof in heaven and in a special place in my heart. The losses never get easier but I have learned from each of these amazing young adults. May they never be forgotten.

Javier refused to say "goodbye" to anyone. You were only allowed to say "Hasta Luego" because he knew we would always meet again.