Angel Tree Fundraisers

I am working to raise money for Kimberley's grant this Christmas season.  The goal is to raise $1,000!  I will keep this post updated with current fund raisers.  I hope you check back and help out where you can!  I will also keep an updated total of the money raised between November 1 and December 31st.

Current Fundraisers:
October 1-December 31:  Scarves and Skirts for Sara.  So far this has raised $21.50 for Kimberley.  50% of the selling price of each item will be donated to Kimberley's grant.  This includes Buy It Now items and special order items.

November 1-December 31 - Ornaments Available.  Any donation of $35 or more to Kimberley's grant will get you a beautiful Reece's Rainbow ornament with Kimberley's picture on it.

November 1-15:  Online Auction.  I am looking for donations if you have something that you can donate.  Here is a post with the current items.

November 1-27:  Colossal Crossroads Challenge.  This is a local event.  So far this has raised $348 for Kimberley.  

Upcoming Fundraisers:  
November:  Paparazzi Jewelry Sale..   There will be an online sale and a local party.  The local party will be on November 22nd.  The online sale will start shortly after.  (Just in time for Cyber Monday!)

Past Fundraisers:

October 1-12:  Cards for a Cause.  This event raised $261 for Kimberley.

Boo! My Thoughts on Halloween

I don't like Halloween.  At all.  I love fall:  pumpkins, colored leaves, cooler weather, hoodies, harvest.  I do not, however, like Halloween.  I don't even think I really liked it as a kid.  (My sister and brother accuse me of having forgotten most of our childhood.  Maybe I forgot the years I liked trick-or-treating.)

It's not a religious thing like a lot of people might assume.  I just think it's dumb.  I don't understand dressing up and begging for candy from people you don't know.  I just don't get why that's fun.  Don't even get me started on celebrating a holiday that glorifies bats.  

I haven't really had to deal with Halloween much as an adult.  When I lived in apartments, it was easy to just ignore it.  The first year that I was in my house, I thought it would be really fun to have trick-or-treaters.  I bought a TON of candy.  I wanted to talk to the kids and ask about their costumes.  I wanted them to say trick-or-treat.  Very few kids showed up.  The ones that did were not chatty.  And what's with the parents having a bag?  Seriously?   

Last year was my second Halloween in my house.  I went out to dinner and a movie with a friend.  We saw Pitch Perfect and loved it.  There was almost no one in the theater.  It was great!  That's my idea of a fun holiday.

I've been saying since last year that I'm not going to take Sara trick-or-treating.  It doesn't sound like fun to me at all.  And, she doesn't know what it is so she won't know what she's missing.  Growing up, we lived in a  small town and only went to houses of people we knew.  My dad drove us around.  To do that with Sara would take hours.  Our friends are so spread out.  And, it would involve getting in and out of the car seat repeatedly.  (Not any one's idea of a good time.)   I don't know anyone in my neighborhood and the thought of getting food from strangers just makes me really nervous.

Those were my concerns before I knew Sara.  Now I know for a fact that I will not take her trick-or-treating this year.  

Sara is a mooch.  She will be best friends with anyone who has food.  It doesn't matter if she knows them or not.  She cuddles up next to them and is eating their food in no time.  Obviously, this is a major problem and cannot continue.  It's something I am working on constantly.

Sara is also very loving to everyone she meets.  She doesn't know what a stranger is and would go with anyone she met.  This is also a major problem and something I am trying to address.

Do you see why I think trick-or-treating is a bad idea?  Let's ring a door bell and ask a perfect stranger for food!  I can see it now--she will be sitting on someone's couch with their candy bowl in her lap.  And I'll get slapped and bitten when I try to get her to leave.  This is a scene I can live without!  

Maybe next year we'll be ready for trick-or-treating.  This year, she can wear her costume to her new school.  (Yay for a new school!)  On Sunday we are going to a Halloween party at Gigi's Playhouse where she can trick-or-treat and wear her costume.  On Thursday night, we will go out to eat and to the movies.  Maybe I'll even let her wear her costume.

Auction for Kimberley

I am hosting an on-line auction for Kimberley.  It will begin November 1 and end November 15th at 9PM Central time.  Here are some of the items up for bid:

To purchase an item, please visit the Facebook Page.  

To donate an item, leave a comment below.  

Guilt?

I participate in a couple of on-line adoption groups. Sometimes, these groups provide an amazing amount of support. Sometimes, they provide an endless amount of frustration when people say and do things that I just don't agree with. Sometimes, they cause me to stop and think about what I really believe. Today falls under the third category.

Someone is selling t-shirts. She posted a picture with this description:

Wanted: a good home for this tshirt. Must love orphans, and believe every child deserves a mom and dad. Washing said shirt is optional, the love part not so much.

My first thought was to comment that I wouldn't be buying a t-shirt from her since I don't believe that every child deserves a mom and a dad.  (Sometimes, I can be a LITTLE passive-aggressive.)  After all, Sara is thriving and she doesn't have a dad.  Then my train of thought started down a crazy, long, guilt-filled track...

*Do I really believe that Sara doesn't deserve a mom and dad?

*Of course, she deserves it.  Every kid does.

*So, did I do her a disservice by adopting her?  Should I have waited and prayed for a married couple to adopt her?  After all, I was reminded time and time again during the process that a lot of Christian organizations don't believe single women should adopt.  (Most won't say that outright but they will only support married couples.)  

*Maybe she deserves it but doesn't need it.  After all, how many kids really have two loving, committed, involved parents.  Then again, I'm not sure I want my child to turn out like all the other kids these days.

*It's not like there is no chance she'll ever have a father.  Then again, there is a chance she won't.  If I actually met someone worthy of being her dad, I would never tell him that I don't think she deserves a father and a mother.

*She's clearly better off with me than she was in an orphanage.  She's growing, learning and talking like crazy.  But, is better off enough?  Doesn't she deserve the best?  But how do I know that "the best" was going to come along for her?  Certainly better off is better than nothing.

*Well, now I don't know what I think.  And I'm feeling kind of guilty.  After all, she loves men.  Maybe she should have a dad...

*How did I end up here from someone's innocent post about a t-shirt?

*Wait!  I answered this question before on my blog.  What did I say then?

How do you let go of the guilt of knowing your child may never have a father? I wonder if I didn't adopt my yet unknown son would a two parent family come along and adopt him? And then he'd have a daddy.   Of course I haven't given up on marriage at all so that's still a possibility. And obviously a mommy is better than an orphanage or mental institution.  When you see kids with their dads do you feel a little bit sad for Sara? 

That's a pretty loaded and personal question.  I'll probably just scratch the surface of this one.  

Like the questioner, I haven't completely given up on the idea of marriage.  I would love for Sara to have an amazing father.  I would love for her to grow up in a stable, two-parent family.  Isn't that what everyone wants for their child?  Unfortunately, we live in a very imperfect world.  (If it was perfect, we wouldn't need adoption at all.)  A lot of children these days don't grow up in two-parent families.  A lot of children grow up with parents that are uninvolved in their lives.  I agree that a mom is better than an orphanage but I think it's more than that.  Sara may only have one parent but she has one parent that is completely devoted to her.  I'd say that's better than two mediocre parents any day!  
(And, if I'm being completely honest, I hated Father's Day this year.  We got to celebrate with my dad but it did highlight what Sara doesn't have.)  

*Hmmmm...well, whether or not she has a father, I need to feed her dinner.  I guess I'll get off the crazy train now.

Yes.  This is really how my mind works.  It spins and spins and rarely comes up with actual answers.

I guess the bottom line for tonight is that God brought Sara to me.  If you know any of our story, you know that has to be true.  If God wants her to have a father, he'll bring him to us as well.  If not, we'll go on growing and learning and thriving together.