Saturday, November 17, 2012

It's Always Darkest Before the Dawn

For some reason, Thursdays seem to be my lowest days in this process.  Maybe it's because I'm so tired from work at that point.  Maybe it's because I feel like I've spent the whole week waiting and nothing has happened.  Maybe it's because I have small group on Thursdays and I feel like I should be authentic with them so it makes me think about how I'm really feeling.  For whatever reason, Thursdays seem to be hard.  

Fridays, however, seem to bring good news.  Usually, it comes around 7pm on Fridays---just as the adoption agency in CA is closing up for the weekend.

Last night, I found out that Sara has an appointment at the Embassy on Monday.  Her article 5 should be issued by Friday.  This means I can book my ticket!!!   (I love to travel and a trip never seems final until the flight has been booked!)  Hopefully, I can do it while I'm still in NY for Thanksgiving so my mom and I can work out our flights together.  I can also work out housing arrangements and get moving on all the other things I need to get done!

I also got a copy of Sara's visa picture.  The email came with a disclaimer:
Please just know that each of these pictures that we get for the visa process comes out very sad. They force the children to have a straight face in the picture. Still, these sweet kids' visa pictures aren't half as bad as my personal passport photo.... oh gosh!  

I'll admit, I was kind of surprised by the picture.  I wasn't even sure it was the same child as the last picture that I had been given of her.  I spent several minutes comparing her features and convincing myself it was the same person.  (It's amazing what a smile can do!)

After studying the picture for quite a while, I've decided that I LOVE it.  It shows that she can follow directions.  She was told not to smile.  She sure didn't!  I also think it shows that she has some spunk.  "You don't want me to smile?  Fine.  This is what you get!"  My guess is that this is the face she makes when she doesn't get her way.  It really isn't going to get her very far with this mom, though, because it makes me chuckle.  I'm also convinced this is how she wakes up in the morning.  (Another sign she was meant to be my daughter.  That's pretty much how I wake up.)

It's the first little glimpse that I've gotten into her personality.  (It's also very possible that I'm reading way too much into a picture!)  

Oh, and yes.  It appears that my Colombian daughter has either blond or red hair.  She'll fit right in with her cousins. 

This picture makes me happy but also makes my heart hurt.  It makes me so anxious to get there and hold her in my arms.  I want to squeeze her and tickle her and swing her around until I see that little face light up.  So, while I can't go get her for a while, I will busy myself with travel arrangements and know that each day brings me closer to that precious face.  


  1. she is beautiful! Frowny face and all :)

  2. I was also very surprised when I first saw it and now I "chuckle" every time I see it! You'll also need to work on her chapped lips & hairstyle!! She needs a good Momma!! And that's you!

  3. You don't know me, so I'm hesitant to comment, but I'm a single mama to a 3ish year old from Ethiopia (home just over a year) and my baby sister (now 28 and clearly not a baby!) is adopted from Colombia. I got a picture of my little one while I was waiting to meet her that absolutely broke me. It was so sad looking. In fact, all five of the pictures I got prior to meeting her were all very serious looking. My actual child, however, smiles constantly and is quite possibly the happiest child I have ever met. It's hard, I know, to wait and wonder. Hang in there! Please feel free to contact me ( if you need any emotional support. Trust me - single parenthood is not a joke! It's so, so hard. Amazing and worth it, but hard. I would not have survived the first year without other single mama adoptive friends to keep me sane.

  4. I'm so happy that things are moving a bit more smoothly for you now! And great song and thanks for sharing it; it's now in my head sometimes, and that's a very good thing :)

  5. Oh my word, that child can glare! I definitely read it the same way you did. I suspect this kid has spunk. But why on earth can't they smile for their pics?